ASUU:'Baddest Striker ever liveth'

Being someone who has  no interest in football, asking me to mention Nigeria's best striker, is like asking the proverbial Hausa hen the way to the river (Ba a tambayar kaza hanyar rafi). That's the entertainment industry for you.

But when we come down to the Educational sector, where I am an active participant, I can easily tell you within the blink of an eye, that ASUU is the best, unbeatable and number one 'striker' in Nigeria.

Born in 1978, ASUU started 'striking' at the age of 10 -- in 1988. But because it was an 'amateur striker' then, ASUU was given RED CARD on 7 August 1988 for stepping on the toes of Gen. Babangida Maiwushirya (the gap-toothed general).

As a 'good striker', ASUU wasn't discouraged by the red card, it metamorphosed into ULA (University Lecturers Association), under the leadership of Prof. Attahiru Jega, the present elections umpire.
After so much 'off-the-pitch striking', the red card was lifted in 1990, and ASUU returned from 'injury leave' both physically and mentally fit, ready to 'strike' again.

On 14 May, 1992 ASUU did what it knows how to do best -- it striked! This time the strike was so unbearable that General Maiwushirya had to issue another 'RED CARD' to the striker. So ASUU was proscribed for the second time on 23 August 1992.

Ever since General Maiwushirya handed over power, the striker has been striking with impunity. He became so strong a striker that he could maradonically break the defense of General Maikwale (the face-marked general) in 1994 and 1996!

Having striked in tough military regimes, the striker sees the civilian regime as a walk over. That's why ASUU striked twice in the tenure of Retired General Maitsagu (Baba Iyabo) in 2002 and 2007.

Determined to deal with the civilian regime, the striker skillfuly broke the defense of Late Alhaji Umaru Maidamanga (the hand-knitted damanga cap) striking twice - in 2008 and 2009.

Having gained international recognition, the striker sees the defense of Mr. Ebele Maimalafa as that of TAHITI. While the striker scored two goals per president, Oga Ebele's confused defense allowed him to have a hat-trick (three goals) in 4 years! One painful thing is that those goals were scored consecutively -- 2011, 2012 and 2013!

Now, ASUU has become so strong a STRIKER that it can compete with internationally renowned strikers such as Lionel Messi, Christiano Ronaldo and Wayne Rooney!
ASUU, PROUDLY NIGERIAN!

ANifowoshe Titilope Tawakkalt
300 Level Law student,university of Ilorin
Ff @classicaltiti